ENTRY SIXTY ONE:
It's been nearly a day since I wrote in this diary. See, I'm not doing too well right now.
I went to school as per usual. Got the usual threats from Sophie, you know? Then there's like this huge blank and I've woken up in the infirmary. I don't know what happened for sure although I can guess.
I'm so sick of this place. Do you know how long it took me to get out of here the first time round? I hardly had a day's illness before I hooked up with Ben, and considering the amount of time he spends in here I think he's a jinx.
I woke up to find An-Paj there checking that I was still alive, at least I suppose that's what he was doing. He asked me lots of things like how I felt and where it hurt. Then he wanted to know what I remembered and I had to tell him I couldn't remember anything. Which is mostly the truth. I have fuzzy memories but they're all silly.
He said that they'd tried to contact Sal-Fina but she appeared to be out of the temple but that Evla was waiting to speak to me if I was up to it.
Evla looked very upset when she saw me. I guess I must look like I've been in the wars. She said that a Wookiee had found me in some back street…which kinda makes sense because I do remember a Wookiee. I thought I was dreaming it. I couldn't tell her any more than I had An-Paj. He seems to think that bits might come back to me over the next day or so but I'm not sure I want them to.
Anyway, Evla was very nice to me. She said she'd swapped shifts with one of the other crèche masters so she could stay with me. Then she added that she was supposed to be searching for a padawan today but that she thought this was more important. I'm ashamed to say I nearly cried at that point, but I have a thing about not crying infront of grown ups so I managed not to. I think she knew I was upset though.
I don't know how she knew I was here. I never asked her. Someone must have told her I guess. It was really good of her to sit with me like that though. An-Paj came back through and I caught him saying that they STILL hadn't managed to find Sal-Fina, and Evla said some very uncomplimentary things in Florizaani. I didn't let her know that I speak a few words of the language and that I know a lot of the swear words and curses because she would have been horrified I think.
She asked me if there was anything that I needed. I said a bath.
See, they stuck me in this sticky pink stuff. It's called Bacta and it SMELLS like Nerf dung. Or at least like how I think Nerf dung would smell. I'm not in the habit of sniffing that kind of thing. Bacta causes cells to repair and mend and I think it's meant to help if you've had surgery and you want the wounds to heal quickly. I didn't have surgery but An-Paj said I was beaten about a fair bit.
Evla stayed for a few hours. She talked and I listened coz I was too tired to speak much. Then her rearranged shift started and she had to go. Sal-Fina didn't turn up for ages! She grudgingly agreed to bring my shoulder bag down, which is why I am typing this now. I hid my diary in the secret compartment, hidden in a box of tissues. I knew she'd never find it in there!
I'll write more tomorrow. My head is sore and I'm going to try to sleep.
ENTRY SIXTY TWO:
An-Paj didn't come to see me this morning but there was a healer who said her name was Leona. I'd never spoken to her before although I'd seen her in the distance from time to time. She seemed nice enough and wanted to sort my pillows out coz I'd flattened them during the night but moving my head and neck hurt so I asked her not to. I think maybe that worried her because the next thing I know Ferdi (the big, fearsome looking one who likes to eat patients if you believe the rumours) was checking my head and neck out. I just wanted to go back to sleep…
It's too cold for that though. It's ALWAYS cold in the infirmary. I think they want to kill off the troublesome patients by letting them freeze. They went away after a while but I managed to get An-Paj's padawan Simeon (think mad hair like a scouring pad gone haywire) to bring me another blanket. I still smell of Bacta so it's a wonder that anyone will talk to me at all.
I just want Master Jinn to come back. It's miserable here.
ENTRY SIXTY THREE:
It looks like there's trouble brewing in the Falmar camp.
From what I gather, Evla was so incensed with Sal-Fina's lack of care that she went to speak to old Windy about it. He was the Nerf brain that fixed me up with her in the first place. He's trying to sort something out. I s'pose I'll get shoved onto some other master that doesn't want me now, but ANYTHING'S better than Sal-Fina!
An-Paj finally put in an appearance. I thought he was keeping unusually silent and for a while I wondered if he was hiding somewhere trying to think up new and untested methods of torture for me. That's what happens when your mind is left to wander unguarded, it runs out of control. He said that this is a security matter and that my attack was reported to the cops. So now I have to give my story to them. Only thing is I have no story.
At least not much of one. I can remember bits and pieces now. I haven't a clue about the Wookiee, I think that was all blurry because whatever happened to me had already taken place. All I do know is that Sophie stole my jacket that I had slung over my shoulder. I ran after her…
I did wonder why none of her other cronies were with her.
We sort of ran to round the back of a cantina, I think. It was really dark…and that's it. That's all I remember. Apart from the Wookiee.
I guess that Sophie's mob must have been hiding and waiting, then jumped me from behind. I'm actually angrier with me for falling for that than I am with them. I AM SO STUPID!!!
Question is, what do I do now?
ENTRY SIXTY FOUR:
I had the CSS guys round speaking to me today. Actually that's a lie: it was too rather hulking females. They said given the nature of the enquiry they didn't want to cause any distress or alarm for me. I think what they meant by that was they wanted to tread carefully incase some sick old pervert grabbed me like three days ago. I'm sure Evla's probably mentioned that to them and they were thinking along those lines. If that happened I would have known. I've had enough experience fighting off animals like Levinstowe to remember what that's like.
I told them very little. I said I had no memory of being in the alleyway or how I got there, and that I hardly remembered a thing afterwards. The only thing I told them was that I remember being stared at by a huge Wookiee but that at the time I thought it was a dream.
Then they started to ask me other stuff like had I been walking back from school alone or with any friends. Did I usually go that route and if not could I think of any reasons why I would go that way instead? Was there anyone at all who may have witnessed my attack? What do I remember leading up to the attack? What sort of day had it been?
Worst of all: do I like my school?
I don't think I gave anything away to them, but I knew that Evla had somehow sensed me flinching at that last question. I hadn't expected her to turn up like that but she's got this habit of knowing when to be there.
As soon as they were gone Evla told me that Master Windu was speaking to the council at that moment about the possibility of relocating me whilst Quiggy and Ben are away (I'm still wondering how this is going to turn out). Then she begged me to speak up if I was having any problems away from the temple. I felt such a rat for lying to her but I couldn't tell her the truth. She said that if I wanted to speak to anyone then I should go to her, and that Master Jinn wouldn't mind because they were old friends. I've never heard him mention her once but I don't think Evla would tell tales. Not like I do.
I really, really wanted to tell her about Sophie's bullying but I was just too scared. The terrible thing is that I know if I don't say anything I will be sent back to school after I am better and it will all start up again.
I'm sure Digwurt's out enjoying herself somewhere as it is the weekend. One day I will get her back for this. I don't care if I have to wait a decade to do it, or fifty years, or even a hundred! She is going to get what's coming to her.
I'll see to that!
ENTRY SIXTY FIVE:
The game is well and truly up.
I tried to keep up my pretence about what happened with Sophie but the CSS managed to get in touch with the Wookiee that found me in the street. It seems she was quite worried about me and had called the temple to see if I was okay, which was very nice of her. An-Paj asked her if she'd seen anything of what had happened and she said that she'd seen a whole bunch of kids who were 'slightly bigger' than me kicking something on the ground. She'd walked over to see what it was and it turned out that the object she'd thought was a bunch of old rags happened to be me. The other kids got scared and ran off.
An-Paj told her to contact the nearest sec station and report what she had seen and now it appears my story is out. I'm still sticking to the tale that I remember nothing about it. I'd look pretty silly if I suddenly admitted I'd lied. Maybe my memory can make a gradual recovery…
They are going to go round and interview some of my classmates.
In a way I'm relieved it's nearly over.
I can get out of here tomorrow if I'm good, so An-Paj says. Which means that if I'm lucky I might be out of here in time for my thirtieth birthday!
Evla dropped in again. She says that I shouldn't feel scared to tell the truth about the bullying that's been going on. Then she also said that the council wants to see me after I've been discharged from here. This must be pretty important and I'm feeling very nervous now.
Maybe something's happened to Master Jinn and Ben! Surely they wouldn't call me infront of them to tell me? Evla would let me know, wouldn't she?
I feel so sick now…please let them be alright. I hope tomorrow never comes.
ENTRY SIXTY SIX:
Well, here it is. The big day. An-Paj has reassured me that if something had happened to either Quiggy or Ben that someone would have told me by now and that the council would not want to speak to me formally about something like that. He said they would send Mace or someone else if the worst had happened.
ENTRY SIXTY SEVEN:
I got the shock of my life just now! Windy appeared to take me before the council. I nearly had heart failure!!! When I pulled myself together I fried An-Paj with a nasty glare, and he blushed a sort of purply blue color. It was a really nice shade! I'm going to have to see what else I can do to get him to blush like that! If it's not bad news what is it they want to talk to me about? Maybe Sal-Fina's found out about that stuff I put in her tea! Maybe they've found someone even more horrible to look after me just because I was so horrid back.
Anyhow, here goes nothing…
ENTRY SIXTY EIGHT:
I don't believe it! I don't believe it! Woooohooooo! I'm saved!
I don't have to live with the old dragon any more! No more being locked out, or wandering rainy streets or even being shoved into cupboards…I'm free! I'm so happy that I could yell! Except that my head still hurts a bit so I don't think that would be a good idea. But who cares about that???
I went to see the council. All of them sitting round in a big circle with me standing in the middle trying to not to be scared or anything. Yoda said he had heard of the attack and that they all hoped that I was feeling better. I told him yes. Then Windy said that he thought on reflection that Sal-Fina might not have been the best choice to look after me seeing as how she was so 'busy'.
Or absent, which is how I would put it.
They said they had lined up another possibility to care for me whilst Master Jinn was gone and they wanted to know what I thought. I was so busy being glad they hadn't found out about the tablets and the worms that I almost missed Evla being ushered into the chamber. I thought she was going to tell them all about Sal-Fina and the things I'd mentioned to her, but then the next thing I know Yoda is asking me if I wanted to stay with Ambianca or would I want to move in with Evla. I think my jaw nearly dislocated in shock! Windy said the choice of course had to be mine, but Evla had actually volunteered to take me in and had worked out a way to reschedule her crèche shifts so that she would be there for me in the evenings and nights. I was so stunned that I could hardly take it in, but then Mace asked me again if I wanted to stay with Sal-Fina and I think I might have said something along the lines of 'No thanks. I'd sooner Corelli kiss a Hutt's backside'.
It was something like that. I slapped my hands over my mouth the moment I remembered where I was and who I was speaking to. Funny thing was though I could have sworn they were all trying not to laugh.
So now I have a place to stay and actual food, where my diary is safe from prying eyes and I can put Snordle on a shelf in the fresher room without having to worry about Ambianca stealing him. I've got a room with a comfortable bed and one of those rugs that my toes disappear in!
I still miss Master Jinn and Ben…but this way I believe the absence is more than bearable!