ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY THREE:
Quiggy came back just now looking rather grim faced. I don't want to know what that means. It doesn't look very good for me though. I can tell when something is bothering him. He's a jedi and jedi don't give things away but somehow I just know when he's upset.
Well, it's gotta be me, right? What else could it be?
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY FOUR:
Quiggy scooped me up and carried me to the infirmary as I didn't think I could walk by myself and there was no way I was going on a repulsar lift trolley thing. I've had enough of those! And there's always the chance they will malfunction and I will fall and break my neck!
I squealed a bit when he picked me up but I soon kept my mouth closed. I just reminded myself it was all my fault and tried to suffer in silence.
I got to the infirmary and this time An-Paj decided to take a look. This wasn't as pleasant as Gethin taking a look. No offence to An-Paj, it's just that he doesn't do anything for me the way that Gethin does. Although I still think those antennae things of An-Paj's are really cool. You just want to reach up and give them a tweak!
He wants to keep an eye on the abscess I've got and monitor the affect the drugs are having on the infection so I have to stay at least one night. When Quiggy realizes that it's nice and peaceful there without me again he is going to definitely decide to put me in a kids home. I just know it!
Ben carried my bag with a nightdress and my diary (couldn't leave you behind, could I?) and now I am doomed once more to lie on sheets that are as comfortable and as fluffy as permacrete bricks.
I hate today.
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY FIVE:
Had an uncomfortable evening here. Simeon popped in and asked if he could get me something. I said I wanted a bedpan, so I could throw it at someone.
I feel very angry with myself right now. I've thrown away the only decent chance of a home I am likely to have. Throw something? Give me a lightsabre and I'd be dangerous!
Ben came in to see how I was. This was nice of him coz I know how much he hates this place. Didn't bring me any grapes though.
I'd written a letter on a sheet of flimsy I begged off Healer P'lila when she was on duty…you know, the tiny healer person I mentioned before. If I'm not careful I'm going to grow up to be as tall as she is! She's nice though. I told her I needed to get a note to Master Jinn and she was only too happy to help.
I just wrote:
PLEASE DON'T SEND ME AWAY. I'M SORRY IF I MADE YOU MAD.
I'm hoping it will do the trick. I gave it to Ben and made him promise not to read it. I asked him to put it under Quiggy's door when he was asleep so that he'd see it in the morning.
Wondering how this will turn out,
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY SIX:
I can't get comfortable! I can't toss and turn coz it hurts - the bed is as hard as nails!
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY SEVEN:
Can't sleep. Need a glass of water…actually I don't really like water. I only drink it coz it's good for your skin. What I'd really like is some of that Wookie hooch stuff, but I'm not likely to find that in the infirmary. Not unless Ferdi's a secret alcoholic…
I thought about pressing the buzzer for assistance but it seems kinda trivial for just a glass of water, so when there's nobody looking I am going to escape! If I can get out the bed without it hurting too much then I have a chance of making it over to the little side room just off from the ward I'm in. There are taps and drinking facilities there for the staff. Now all I have to do is stay out of sight.
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY EIGHT:
Aborted first attempt. Healer P'lila is still about although she must surely be going home sometime? Even a jedi has to sleep!
Can't see her now…am going to try again. Back soon!
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY NINE:
Still no luck. I'm gonna die of thirst. Maybe I should just press the buzzer thingy?
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY:
I want a beer! And the room service in this place is terrible!
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY ONE:
I'm back in bed...I really wish I hadn't bothered now.
I'm not talking about the discomfort either. I got off the bed after a small struggle ad waited 'til I heard Healer P'lila leave. I walked slowly past the doorway and then went over to the water dispenser to grab myself a drink. And guess what? They were out of plasti-cups! Then I decided to try the little fountain thing and I couldn't reach it (must be bothersome for Healer P'lila too) so I went to fetch a stool to stand on. Next door I could hear voices in the connecting room…
Master Jinn and An-Paj!
I very nearly panicked coz I knew it meant that not only had Quiggy not been back and got my note (it was still too early for him to go to sleep) but that he had decided to check up on me! I calmed down a bit and then did what Quiggy always says you shouldn't do: pressed me ear to the door and eavesdropped.
I wish I hadn't.
I heard the words "impossible" and "frustrating" and "irritating" amongst a few others. Then I heard Master Jinn say that he and Master Windu had been talking about what was to happen to me and that Windy had said it was for Quiggy to decide but that things weren't working out. Then Quiggy said that things couldn't stay as they were…and An-Paj agreed and said if Quiggy needed any help in finding me somewhere else to stay he would do what he could, and that it was probably all for the best.
This means they've made up their minds and I'm going to be sent away.
Well, not if I can help it! I'll runaway first, see if I don't! (Well, slowly anyway). I've heard about these kids homes and I am NOT going into one!
I sneaked back into bed and closed my eyes; just incase Quiggy showed up. I was dreading him speaking to me. He turned up some fifteen minutes or so later, at a guess. Then he hovered for a moment at the end of my bed. I just kept my eyes closed the whole time and hoped he would go away.
Then after a few moments he did just that.
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY TWO:
My clothes are already stuffed into my bag as I am wearing my nightclothes. I'm going to have to get changed somehow or else I will stick out like a sore thumb. Maybe I'll hide some place like the ladies freshers or something until it's safe. Then I can get changed.
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY THREE:
I did it, I sneaked out. I'm still wearing my nightdress though. Couldn't get to the freshers coz there's too many healer people about. I'm hiding in a storage room right now. It's full of rather ancient looking equipment, packing cases and a bed that has seen better days plus mattress that look as if someone's been chewing holes in them. Still, it'll do for the moment. I can get some rest whilst I'm forming my escape plan.
I hope the mattress doesn't have fleas.
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY FOUR:
I hate to admit to feeling upset but I am, even though I know it's my entire fault and I deserve whatever happens to me. I guess I thought - relied upon - being more important than I am to Master Jinn and Ben. The only thing I can do now is try and find somewhere new to stay. If I can get to Flint, maybe she can help me.
This mattress is awful! I won't tell you what it smells like!
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE:
My chrono says that it's been five hours since I left now. Somebody will have spotted I am gone…one of the healers probably. Whoever was on duty after Healer P'lila. I wonder if they will try to find me first or contact Master Jinn?
I've tried to think of a plan, but I don't have one. Imagination's meant to be my strong point, too.
I was going to try and sneak away in the night but I realize that people are more likely to think twice about seeing me up and about at this time of night then they are during the morning, so I will wait a few hours and try and get to the nearest turbo lift that will take me towards the exit.
Awww, hell! The light in here is flickering! If it goes out I'll be in the dark! The how will I get out?
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY SIX:
I just did a really stupid thing. I tied to get out the room before the light went out and then I managed to pull the storage containers down onto me. I'm not hurt, but I'm lying on the floor in a very uncomfortable position, typing this with one hand. I hope they don't slip any further down or I will get squished! And the damn light is still flickering! If it goes out I am in BIGGGGGGGGG trouble! And then I won't be able to see! These storage containers are really heavy. It's squashing the breath out of me.
Please, light! Please don't go out!
ENTRY ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY SEVEN:
E cint Seu tY tipe. Thr liGyt wemt owt.