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Entry Number One: The Gungan City To the tune of The Windy City from the musical Calamity Jane. Lyrics suitably warped by Jemmiah. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I just flew in from the Gungan City. The Gungan City is mighty pretty, But they ain’t got what we’ve got, No siree! They’ve got shacks deep within the ocean, The journey there caused quite a commotion, And the view might be great but: It's not for me. On Naboo it's a zoo; They've got creatures that they call Kaadu. Private homes, mounted guards. For the sake of civic virtue, they’ve got stun prods there that hurt you! I just flew in from the Gungan City. The Gungan City is mighty pretty, But they ain’t got what we’ve got; I’m telling you Mace! We’ve got more life here in the Council, Than within their Sacred Place! In the swamp was a crazy’ feller, All confused and kinda yeller, And the things that he said there, went somethin’ like this... (Everyone laughs while Obi-Wan does an impression of Jar-Jar) You should have seen when our craft was stoppin’, He was hoppin’ with eyes a poppin’, At the sights that we saw there, Yes siree! I stayed calm and then my master; He knocked out that Gungan disaster, Just as fast as a Gundark, A climbin’ a tree. Close your eyes and just wish, When you need one there's a bigger fish. Wiring's fried, lights have died, Gungans panic and they oughta, when the Bongo's filled with water. I just flew back from the Gungan City. The Gungan City is mighty pretty, But they ain’t got what we’ve got; I’m telling you Bant, I wouldn't swap my time on Naboo , With my life on Coruscant! Entry Number Two: Yesterday To the tune of Yesterday by The Beatles Sung from Darth Maul's P.O.V Lyrics twisted by Jemmiah ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Yesterday, All my troubles seemed so far away, Now my future’s looking rather grey, Oh, I believe in yesterday. Suddenly, I’m not half the man I used to be. And there’s a Jedi standing over me. Oh Sith! How I want yesterday. Why I was too slow, I don’t know, I couldn’t say. I did something wrong, Now I long for yesterdaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! Yesterday, Hunt the Jedi was a game to play, Now my torso’s just been sawn away. Oh, I believe in yesterday… Entry Number Three: Dead Flowers To the tune of Dead Flowers by the Rolling Stones: Lyrics by Darth Tim ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When you're sittin' there In your Death Star throne room chair Watchin' as the Rebel ships explode I hope you don't mind me, and my Jedi progeny You know I always hate to be alone I'll toss you down, Master Palpy, toss you down I know you think you're the baddest Sith Lord around And you can zap me with Force lightning when I betray ya Zap him with Force lightning, when he won't turn Zap me with Force lightnin, when I kill ya And us ghosts will have a party, when you're gone When you're sittin' back Planning out your next attack Getting ready for that final battle day I'll be in my meditation room Plotting out your doom So I can rule beside my son someday, hey hey Strike you down, in his anger, strike you down I know you think you're the baddest Sith Lord around And you can zap me with Force lightning when I betray ya Zap him with Force lightning, when he won't turn Zap me with Force lightning, when I kill ya And us ghosts will have a party when you're gone Throw you down, Master Palpy, throw you down...etc. Entry Number Four: Living In The Maw To The Tune of Living On A Prayer by Bon Jovi Lyrics by Sebulba2179 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A long time ago, in a galaxy far away... Tarkin used to work on Kuat Rebels made a strike, he's down on his luck It's tough, so tough Daala builds destroyers all day Working for her man, she makes Tarkin pay For love, for love She says, "We gotta hold on to Lemelisk It doesn't matter if we lose the Basilisk We got Qwi Xux, and work is brisk For love, we'll take up the risk" Ohhh, we'll break the law Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw Take my ship to those holes I saw Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw Tarkin's got his Death Star in space Now he's blowing up what made Leia talk So tough, it's tough Daala dreams of running the fleet When she hits Yavin 4, Tarkin whispers "Baby, it's your beat, my treat" We gotta hold on to Lemelisk It doesn't matter if we lose the Basilisk We got Qwi Xux, and work is brisk For love, we'll take up the risk Ohhh, we'll break the law Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw Take my ship to those holes I saw Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw Ohhhhhh, we gotta hold on to Maw Cluster You live to pass Emperor Palpy's muster Ohhh, we'll break the law Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw Take my ship to those holes I saw Ohhh, oh, living in the Maw... Entry Number Five: Corellian Woman To the tune of American Woman by The Guess Who Lyrics by Sebulba2179 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Corellian woman, get away from me Corellian woman, mama let me be Don't come a-hangin' around my ship I don't wanna see your sensor blip I got more important things to do Than spend my time smuggling with you Now woman, said get away Corellian woman, listen what I sa-a-a-ay Corellian woman, get away from me Corellian woman, mama let me be Don't come a-knockin' my space-barn door I don't wanna see your freighter no more Hyperspace can't hypnotise Dizzy someone else who flies Now woman, said get away Corellian woman, listen what I say Corellian woman, said get away Corellian woman, listen what I say Don't come a-hangin' around Kessel Don't wanna see your spice vessel I don't need your war machines I don't need your Death Star schemes Hyperspace can't hypnotise Dizzy someone else who flies Now woman, get away from me Corellian woman, mama let me be No, gotta get away, gotta get away from Tatooine I'm gonna leave you woman, on Tatooine, woman Bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye You're no good for me, for my smugglin' trade Gonna jump into hyperspace, you can watch my thrusters fade You know I'm gonna leave, you know I'm gonna go You know I'm gonna leave, you know I'm gonna go, woman I'm gonna leave you on Tatooine Goodbye, Corellian woman Goodbye, Corellian woman... Entry Number Six: Qui-Gon's song To the tune of Adam's Song by Blink 182 Lyrics by Miana Kenobi ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I never thought I'd die alone I thought my Master was made of stone He got backed up against the wall But Qui-Gon got cut down by darth maul. I took my time, I slowed down now Qui-Gon cannot see the town the town of Theed, where we're at where the federation ships have sat I never angered, I never pained 16 just held such better days Days when you were still alive when we couldn't wait to get outside the universe is wide, time flys by the war is over I've survived Now I wait to fly back home to spend some time in our room alone I never though I'd die alone another 6 months you'll be unknow I'll take your things to your friends I'll never set foot in your room again I'll close it off, board it up Until the time that I set it up for Anakin to live in Please don't take it as a sin I never angered, I never pained 16 just held such better days Days when you were still alive when we couldn't wait to get outside the universe is wide, time flys by the war is over I've survived Now I wait to fly back home to spend some time in our room alone MUSICAL INTERLUDE I never angered, Never pained Tomorrow will hold such a better day A day when I can give up my tithe And I can't wait to get outside The universe it wide, the time flew by the war is over only I survived And I can't wait 'til I get home to remember our times in my room alone. Entry Number Seven: Poisoning Padawans in the Park To the tune of Poisoning Pigeons in the Park by Tom Lehrer Lyrics by Jemmiah ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spring is here, Yes! Spring is here. Life is torture And life is fear. I think the spring is the loveliest time of the year. It’s true. Don’t you? Course you do. But there’s one thing that makes it complete for me, And makes every weekend a treat for me… All the world is in tune On this fine afternoon When we’re poisoning padawans in the park. There is no greater way To spend such a nice day When we’re poisoning padawans in the park. We’ll murder them all amidst laughter and merriment Apart from the few we take home to experiment. In slaughter we’re dealing What a wonderful feeling To poison a padawan in the park! What a lack of propriety In Coruscant society Who look down their noses at our games. They challenge our piety Our loss of sobriety And call us a variety Of unsporting names. But it isn’t a great stomach churner, To dispose of a padawan learner… Every night after tea My master and me Will go poisoning padawans in the park. And maybe we’ll do-in A master, or two As we poison the padawans in the park. When they see us coming The braid brigade will try and hide But they still eat Takkini chips That are coated with Cyanide It’s my one greatest pleasure So I spend all my leisure Just poisoning the padawans- In line with my masterplans- Yes, poisoning padawans in the park! Next Back Main Page |
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